Social Eating at Night

I am so bad at social eating late at night, I hate it, I know its bad for me, and I need to stop, but its like my stomach is grumbling cause I ate a couple hours earlier, I am hungry and the food other people are eating is so so good! So I order something, and then I eat it, and then I cant sleep...and I lay awake thinking, I am an idiot...I shouldn't have eaten that and its going straight to my gut, hips thighs, ass, arms, chin...or wherever else unwanted fat ends up.

I am guessing you guys can guess where this is going, last night I went out, (I made dinner before so I wouldn't be tempted) and after my writers group we went to a Irish Pub, and I was originally just going to get water and be good, but my stomach started grumbling so I ordered a hamburger cause they were half off...I did immediately cut it in half and separate the fries in half so I only ate half of it but still...so bad for me, and it was like 10 pm so I ended up staying up late staring at my ceiling unable to sleep cause I ate so late. I was kinda proud of myself for cutting it in half and not devouring the entire damn thing though so YAY For small...very small as in 2 steps forward and 3 steps back victories...well this was more like 2 steps forward and 1 1/2 steps back cause before I would have ordered the food and eaten it all. I eventually gave up feeling guilty and went to sleep but still I was so annoyed. So yesterday with my terrific blunder I was 234 calories over my daily goal...so I netted 1,542 calories (the rest of my day was really really good a banana for breakfast, a bell pepper and apple sauce for lunch, peanut butter and trail mix as a snack and then 1056 calories for dinner)...which I guess in the grand scheme of things probably isn't too too bad..but its still not good. I am going to slap myself on the hand and yell bad Sara. Done (and yes I did just get some weird looks from a person that happened to be walking by my cube). And now its time to move on.

I was planning on going hiking this weekend, but it started raining yesterday, and its not supposed to stop again until Wednesday or Tuesday next week. So much for running this afternoon like I planned, I guess I will do either Budokon or some of the workout videos I found on neflix watch instantly...or maybe I will do something from the fit channel. A couple of days ago I was reading a blog by Jen called Prior Fat Girl, and I came across an interesting list of some common excuses as to why people don't work out...and I made myself a bullshit list (from her list) that I am going to put up on a poster and hang on the wall of my room. So far my list is:

"I don't have time to work out"...Bullshit, any workout will help, even if you do 10 minutes a day.

"I cant afford it"...Bullshit, Running/Walking outside is Free & Fit Channel is included in cable

"Dieting is Unrealistic"...Bullshit,, managing calories and eating less food saves money

"I tried a diet once, it didn't work"...Bullshit, It didn't work cause you didn't commit, its not a diet its a lifestyle change

"Its genetics, that's why I am like this"...Bullshit, Genetics, have nothing to do with unhealthy choices

"If I buy healthy food it will just go to waste"...Bullshit, Plan your meals, buy what you need, and if you stick with it you will save money and get healthy.

So that's my bullshit list, every time I think of an excuse for not doing what I am supposed to I think I am going to add it to a bullshit list and then write why the excuse is bullshit...and sorry for all the cussing.

I also kinda cheated today and I got on the crappy scale just to peek and its down to 200lbs, so I don't know if the scale is accurate or if its crappy...I think what I need to do is weigh myself on it then immediately walk to the gym and use the nice fancy like a doctors scale and see where I am at, and then check the scale...but going off that scale I gained 5lbs but I lost it again (probably just water weight so I am still about the same) but no need to panic I guess. And my arms are killing me. That's all for now. I really want to take a nap.